








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 2076 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 417 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 320 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 291 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 261 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 155 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 106 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 97 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 85 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 78 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 67 matches | ||
| Faceit | 33 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Edin | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 16 different maps





Our logs show 43 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




101 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
21716 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 65,762 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 19392 | 29% |
| Smokes | 20271 | 31% |
| HE Grenades | 9986 | 15% |
| Molotovs | 16113 | 25% |
Our logs show you have wasted $3,627,651 of utility $93 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 155 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #10 | ε°ζ© | 50% | 265 |
| #11 | Stalin | 50% | 133 |
| #12 | Vocs | 48% | 131 |
| #13 | ηηε°δΊ | 48% | 363 |
| #14 | π πΌ π π π | 46% | 99 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Lord Habibi | 18 | 0.0046 |
| #2 | ηηε°δΊ | 14 | 0.0019 |
| #3 | ππ€ πππ’π | 14 | 0.0032 |
| #4 | Quack | 14 | 0.0057 |
| #5 | Kai | 13 | 0.0012 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Kai | 2243 | 0.21 | 50 min |
| #2 | ηηε°δΊ | 1628 | 0.23 | 41 min |
| #3 | STYLISH HUNTER | 1555 | 0.29 | 38 min |
| #4 | HEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHE | 758 | 0.19 | 18 min |
| #5 | Lord Habibi | 667 | 0.17 | 15 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ππ€ πππ’π | +3.83 | 90 | 50 |
| #2 | Stalin | +2.16 | 76 | 60 |
| #3 | πͺπΆπΈπ² π°ππͺπ½π½ β
| +2.14 | 75 | 54 |
| #4 | ck_____101 | +1.48 | 78 | 59 |
| #5 | Kai | +1.10 | 61 | 66 |





