








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 490 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 217 matches | ||
| Faceit | 169 matches | ||
| Wingman | 43 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 20 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 14 different maps





Our logs show 37 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




15 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
6234 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 15,822 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 4303 | 27% |
| Smokes | 4386 | 28% |
| HE Grenades | 2966 | 19% |
| Molotovs | 4167 | 26% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,863,581 of utility $175 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 775 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Sargent Gutta | 62% | 90 |
| #2 | KingPyroe | 61% | 46 |
| #3 | Voice | 59% | 182 |
| #4 | DTDusty | 57% | 56 |
| #5 | ☢ | 57% | 44 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #5 | ☢ | 57% | 44 |
| #6 | Swarm | 55% | 128 |
| #7 | dusty | 55% | 56 |
| #8 | lolkid007 | 55% | 91 |
| #9 | burp | 51% | 37 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Voice | 10 | 0.0026 |
| #2 | Sargent Gutta | 8 | 0.0044 |
| #3 | Swarm | 4 | 0.0014 |
| #4 | ☢ | 4 | 0.0042 |
| #5 | lolkid007 | 3 | 0.0016 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Swarm | 748 | 0.27 | 19 min |
| #2 | Voice | 744 | 0.19 | 13 min |
| #3 | Sargent Gutta | 282 | 0.15 | 5 min |
| #4 | lolkid007 | 241 | 0.13 | 5 min |
| #5 | dusty | 180 | 0.15 | 4 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ☢ | +2.87 | 78 | 62 |
| #2 | Hadrian | +1.17 | 84 | 59 |
| #3 | dusty | +0.86 | 78 | 53 |
| #4 | lolkid007 | +0.71 | 63 | 59 |
| #5 | Swarm | -0.05 | 61 | 61 |





