








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 436 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 219 matches | ||
| Faceit | 126 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 23 matches | ||
| Wingman | 18 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 4 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 41 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




16 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4025 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 20,008 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 6154 | 31% |
| Smokes | 6964 | 35% |
| HE Grenades | 3203 | 16% |
| Molotovs | 3687 | 18% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,030,992 of utility $100 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 389 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #5 | B3RRG | 50% | 165 |
| #6 | infrnL | 49% | 79 |
| #7 | marktheshark | 45% | 49 |
| #8 | Treat PhD- | 45% | 47 |
| #9 | AH Mouse | 38% | 47 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | C.R.E.A.M. | 520 | 0.20 | 15 min |
| #2 | B3RRG | 441 | 0.13 | 11 min |
| #3 | infrnL | 437 | 0.26 | 9 min |
| #4 | Treat PhD- | 234 | 0.23 | 7 min |
| #5 | Treat PhDD | 156 | 0.18 | 5 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Treat PhD- | +3.87 | 83 | 56 |
| #2 | C.R.E.A.M. | +3.80 | 87 | 64 |
| #3 | Treat PhDD | +2.59 | 89 | 65 |
| #4 | marktheshark | +1.59 | 74 | 59 |
| #5 | angle ♥ | +1.21 | 82 | 51 |





