










System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 157 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 18 matches | ||
| Premier | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 7 different maps





Our logs show 14 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




0 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Your loyalty is impressive.
192 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 820 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 63 | 8% |
| Smokes | 256 | 31% |
| HE Grenades | 280 | 34% |
| Molotovs | 221 | 27% |
Our logs show you have wasted $122,934 of utility $199 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 16 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | DripDrip | 100% | 5 |
| #2 | Hans HermannS | 67% | 3 |
| #3 | Akii. | 50% | 2 |
| #4 | xIPinguIx | 48% | 21 |
| #5 | Erwinho | 46% | 28 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | Hans HermannS | 67% | 3 |
| #3 | Akii. | 50% | 2 |
| #4 | xIPinguIx | 48% | 21 |
| #5 | Erwinho | 46% | 28 |
| #6 | Kogo | 0% | 2 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | xIPinguIx | 4 | 0.0096 |
| #2 | Hans HermannS | 1 | 0.0169 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | xIPinguIx | 57 | 0.14 | 2 min |
| #2 | Erwinho | 33 | 0.06 | 1 min |
| #3 | DripDrip | 18 | 0.24 | 0 min |
| #4 | Hans HermannS | 5 | 0.08 | 0 min |
| #5 | Akii. | 3 | 0.07 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | DripDrip | +3.58 | 30 | 54 |
| #2 | xIPinguIx | +2.26 | 78 | 66 |
| #3 | Erwinho | +1.82 | 88 | 66 |
| #4 | Hans HermannS | +1.27 | 71 | 54 |
| #5 | Akii. | -0.70 | 82 | 67 |





