










System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 307 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 26 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 8 different maps





Our logs show 24 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




6 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
404 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 994 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 317 | 32% |
| Smokes | 147 | 15% |
| HE Grenades | 374 | 38% |
| Molotovs | 156 | 16% |
Our logs show you have wasted $134,371 of utility $176 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 28 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | DripDrip | 100% | 5 |
| #2 | Kogo | 70% | 10 |
| #3 | Hans HermannS | 63% | 8 |
| #4 | RaNicK | 60% | 5 |
| #5 | Erwinho | 56% | 27 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #4 | RaNicK | 60% | 5 |
| #5 | Erwinho | 56% | 27 |
| #6 | yaso | 50% | 2 |
| #7 | Akii. | 50% | 2 |
| #8 | Adimys | 48% | 21 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Hans HermannS | 3 | 0.0194 |
| #2 | Erwinho | 1 | 0.0018 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Erwinho | 25 | 0.05 | 1 min |
| #2 | DripDrip | 18 | 0.24 | 0 min |
| #3 | Kogo | 14 | 0.07 | 0 min |
| #4 | Adimys | 12 | 0.03 | 0 min |
| #5 | Hans HermannS | 11 | 0.07 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | RaNicK | +6.41 | 85 | 47 |
| #2 | DripDrip | +3.58 | 30 | 54 |
| #3 | xIPinguIx | +3.10 | 83 | 61 |
| #4 | Erwinho | +1.57 | 88 | 68 |
| #5 | Hans HermannS | +1.15 | 71 | 58 |





