








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 729 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 528 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 46 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 27 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 22 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 18 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 9 matches | ||
| Faceit | 7 matches | ||
| Wingman | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 18 different maps





Our logs show 75 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




45 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
5666 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 25,407 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 4435 | 17% |
| Smokes | 7453 | 29% |
| HE Grenades | 7066 | 28% |
| Molotovs | 6453 | 25% |
Our logs show you have wasted $3,028,675 of utility $193 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 218 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Mr. Yodis Džordi | 52% | 116 |
| #2 | kyle wolfe | 51% | 169 |
| #3 | Alhamdulillah | 51% | 43 |
| #4 | xXPersianXx | 50% | 212 |
| #5 | Tomzem | 48% | 181 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #5 | Tomzem | 48% | 181 |
| #6 | Gryfaak | 48% | 623 |
| #7 | ☣Mr.NickFlow☣ | 46% | 219 |
| #8 | Arozz1. | 45% | 467 |
| #9 | Vii | 45% | 413 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Gryfaak | 41 | 0.0031 |
| #2 | Arozz1. | 28 | 0.0028 |
| #3 | ☣Mr.NickFlow☣ | 19 | 0.0041 |
| #4 | kyle wolfe | 17 | 0.0047 |
| #5 | Tomzem | 16 | 0.0042 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Gryfaak | 1327 | 0.10 | 32 min |
| #2 | xXPersianXx | 541 | 0.12 | 14 min |
| #3 | Mr. Yodis Džordi | 541 | 0.22 | 13 min |
| #4 | ☣Mr.NickFlow☣ | 516 | 0.11 | 15 min |
| #5 | Tomzem | 471 | 0.12 | 13 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Alhamdulillah | +2.89 | 73 | 66 |
| #2 | kyle wolfe | +1.80 | 80 | 52 |
| #3 | Tomzem | +1.42 | 80 | 56 |
| #4 | xXPersianXx | +1.33 | 56 | 73 |
| #5 | ☣Mr.NickFlow☣ | +0.85 | 51 | 75 |





