








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 255 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 395 matches | ||
| Wingman | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Edin | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Grail | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Jura | 1 match | ||
| Faceit | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 23 different maps





Our logs show 45 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




36 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
5826 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 17,125 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 4893 | 29% |
| Smokes | 5354 | 31% |
| HE Grenades | 3138 | 18% |
| Molotovs | 3740 | 22% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,687,586 of utility $154 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 244 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #11 | ✪ shockwave | 49% | 237 |
| #12 | LennyS | 47% | 98 |
| #13 | Mopf | 45% | 121 |
| #14 | O w N i x´X | 42% | 129 |
| #15 | T!me0ut? | 36% | 44 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Robin | 18 | 0.0025 |
| #2 | ✪ shockwave | 12 | 0.0025 |
| #3 | TrV | 6 | 0.0028 |
| #4 | Mischgemuese | 5 | 0.0037 |
| #5 | ᴿᴵᴳᴼᴿ | 3 | 0.0009 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Robin | 1029 | 0.14 | 24 min |
| #2 | ✪ shockwave | 693 | 0.14 | 16 min |
| #3 | TrV | 494 | 0.23 | 14 min |
| #4 | Mopf | 408 | 0.16 | 9 min |
| #5 | ᴿᴵᴳᴼᴿ | 390 | 0.11 | 9 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | TrV | +1.85 | 66 | 71 |
| #2 | Doomsday | +1.84 | 75 | 67 |
| #3 | kw6 | +1.27 | 74 | 64 |
| #4 | pyro | +1.07 | 69 | 62 |
| #5 | Robin | +0.86 | 70 | 60 |





