








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 268 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 54 matches | ||
| Esplay | 4 matches | 1,424 | |
| Wingman | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 10 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




3 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1041 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 2,597 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 634 | 24% |
| Smokes | 601 | 23% |
| HE Grenades | 710 | 27% |
| Molotovs | 652 | 25% |
Our logs show you have wasted $335,943 of utility $181 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 223 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Daemon | 75% | 8 |
| #2 | GZA | 67% | 21 |
| #3 | SMB | 65% | 34 |
| #4 | Luftwasser | 64% | 14 |
| #5 | surpr1se | 64% | 36 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | SneLHesT | 5 | 0.0043 |
| #2 | uzze | 5 | 0.0115 |
| #3 | SMB | 4 | 0.0052 |
| #4 | surpr1se | 3 | 0.0041 |
| #5 | GZA | 2 | 0.0051 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | SMB | 233 | 0.30 | 8 min |
| #2 | SneLHesT | 85 | 0.07 | 2 min |
| #3 | surpr1se | 76 | 0.10 | 2 min |
| #4 | jackw | 59 | 0.41 | 2 min |
| #5 | Luftwasser | 45 | 0.13 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Noob | +4.77 | 79 | 47 |
| #2 | SMB | +3.72 | 71 | 79 |
| #3 | uzze | +3.08 | 75 | 58 |
| #4 | Korkut Binay Özdinar | +2.37 | 82 | 53 |
| #5 | jackw | +2.15 | 64 | 78 |





