








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 857 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 225 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 41 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 4 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 100 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




15 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
5128 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 12,825 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 5806 | 45% |
| Smokes | 2734 | 21% |
| HE Grenades | 3035 | 24% |
| Molotovs | 1250 | 10% |
Our logs show you have wasted $949,559 of utility $117 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 530 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | DjasKier™ | 64% | 133 |
| #2 | R.C. | 62% | 29 |
| #3 | ***SallyKint*** | 61% | 23 |
| #4 | Imagine Wagons | 61% | 97 |
| #5 | SnooZi | 58% | 137 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | ***SallyKint*** | 61% | 23 |
| #4 | Imagine Wagons | 61% | 97 |
| #5 | SnooZi | 58% | 137 |
| #6 | Guardian™ | 55% | 213 |
| #7 | Olly | 51% | 39 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Imagine Wagons | 6 | 0.0030 |
| #2 | Guardian™ | 3 | 0.0007 |
| #3 | SnooZi | 1 | 0.0004 |
| #4 | DjasKier™ | 1 | 0.0004 |
| #5 | Olly | 1 | 0.0012 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Guardian™ | 386 | 0.09 | 9 min |
| #2 | Imagine Wagons | 276 | 0.14 | 8 min |
| #3 | DjasKier™ | 137 | 0.05 | 4 min |
| #4 | Olly | 60 | 0.07 | 1 min |
| #5 | R.C. | 49 | 0.07 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ๖ۣۜMiD-kNiGht۰۪ | +2.44 | 75 | 66 |
| #2 | Imagine Wagons | +2.43 | 61 | 67 |
| #3 | DjasKier™ | +1.78 | 81 | 60 |
| #4 | Guardian™ | +1.05 | 77 | 61 |
| #5 | R.C. | +0.08 | 69 | 68 |





