








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 14 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 62 matches | ||
| Faceit | 25 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show 4 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




2 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
794 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 4,311 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1118 | 26% |
| Smokes | 1088 | 25% |
| HE Grenades | 792 | 18% |
| Molotovs | 1313 | 30% |
Our logs show you have wasted $291,395 of utility $97 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 7 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Panda | 82% | 11 |
| #2 | KaebtinRob | 46% | 48 |
| #3 | ๖ۣۜGod Prawn | 45% | 84 |
| #4 | Geo_W | 44% | 25 |
| #5 | K3TTY SP4GH3TT1 | 41% | 79 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #4 | Geo_W | 44% | 25 |
| #5 | K3TTY SP4GH3TT1 | 41% | 79 |
| #6 | Sumage | 40% | 42 |
| #7 | Devon | 40% | 10 |
| #8 | smizzle | 36% | 11 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ๖ۣۜGod Prawn | 10 | 0.0058 |
| #2 | Geo_W | 2 | 0.0039 |
| #3 | K3TTY SP4GH3TT1 | 1 | 0.0006 |
| #4 | KaebtinRob | 1 | 0.0010 |
| #5 | Sumage | 1 | 0.0012 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | K3TTY SP4GH3TT1 | 378 | 0.23 | 10 min |
| #2 | ๖ۣۜGod Prawn | 258 | 0.15 | 6 min |
| #3 | KaebtinRob | 86 | 0.08 | 2 min |
| #4 | Geo_W | 64 | 0.13 | 2 min |
| #5 | Sumage | 61 | 0.07 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Panda | +9.55 | 94 | 58 |
| #2 | Devon | +4.30 | 84 | 65 |
| #3 | K3TTY SP4GH3TT1 | +1.88 | 77 | 51 |
| #4 | ๖ۣۜGod Prawn | +1.23 | 65 | 55 |
| #5 | m4x5ton | -0.67 | 43 | 56 |





