








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 355 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 194 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 4 matches | ||
| Wingman | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match | ||
| Faceit | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 15 different maps





Our logs show 19 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




33 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2102 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 8,918 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3133 | 35% |
| Smokes | 2267 | 25% |
| HE Grenades | 1818 | 20% |
| Molotovs | 1700 | 19% |
Our logs show you have wasted $897,648 of utility $157 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 33 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | lafla | 29 | 0.0109 |
| #2 | volchorn:) | 7 | 0.0087 |
| #3 | Gaziks52 | 6 | 0.0043 |
| #4 | hexagram | 6 | 0.0051 |
| #5 | TOMSLV | 5 | 0.0029 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | lafla | 451 | 0.17 | 11 min |
| #2 | hexagram | 333 | 0.29 | 9 min |
| #3 | TOMSLV | 211 | 0.12 | 6 min |
| #4 | kajelz | 158 | 0.12 | 3 min |
| #5 | volchorn:) | 138 | 0.17 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | hexagram | +5.30 | 88 | 63 |
| #2 | shaavejs | +2.77 | 75 | 61 |
| #3 | mindplovs:D | +2.38 | 64 | 56 |
| #4 | galvsitis | +2.32 | 56 | 67 |
| #5 | lafla | +1.83 | 75 | 56 |





