








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 34 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 129 matches | ||
| Wingman | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 6 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




4 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
843 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 3,610 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 607 | 17% |
| Smokes | 975 | 27% |
| HE Grenades | 1458 | 40% |
| Molotovs | 570 | 16% |
Our logs show you have wasted $484,793 of utility $139 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 7 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #6 | Beercules | 45% | 11 |
| #7 | koeni | 45% | 29 |
| #8 | Scheppertonne | 42% | 24 |
| #9 | p4t_K | 40% | 20 |
| #10 | keyboard | 39% | 33 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Le Chef | 5 | 0.0015 |
| #2 | Fabregas_The_4 | 2 | 0.0013 |
| #3 | Icey | 2 | 0.0070 |
| #4 | mimo | 1 | 0.0010 |
| #5 | Scheppertonne | 1 | 0.0019 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Le Chef | 585 | 0.18 | 16 min |
| #2 | Scheppertonne | 98 | 0.19 | 2 min |
| #3 | p4t_K | 75 | 0.18 | 2 min |
| #4 | Fabregas_The_4 | 58 | 0.04 | 1 min |
| #5 | mimo | 44 | 0.04 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | koeni | +3.04 | 83 | 54 |
| #2 | Scheppertonne | +2.20 | 63 | 75 |
| #3 | mimo | +2.00 | 43 | 48 |
| #4 | Icey | +1.24 | 71 | 51 |
| #5 | Le Chef | +1.20 | 18 | 74 |





