








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1463 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 348 matches | ||
| Premier | 155 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 99 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 65 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 58 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 52 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 45 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 45 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 25 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 24 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 4 matches | ||
| Wingman | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Palacio | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Edin | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 18 different maps





Our logs show 29 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




18 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
8473 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 35,846 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 9992 | 28% |
| Smokes | 11612 | 32% |
| HE Grenades | 5788 | 16% |
| Molotovs | 8454 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,639,036 of utility $80 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 1172 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | alice | 61% | 413 |
| #2 | Ani | 59% | 261 |
| #3 | Waluigi | 57% | 134 |
| #4 | Xman0311 | 57% | 357 |
| #5 | KiteTown | 56% | 109 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | alice | 642 | 0.08 | 17 min |
| #2 | Ani | 487 | 0.09 | 14 min |
| #3 | BotBobanomics | 478 | 0.09 | 11 min |
| #4 | ✪Vince✪ | 436 | 0.16 | 11 min |
| #5 | Waluigi | 334 | 0.13 | 7 min |





