








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1098 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 590 matches | ||
| Faceit | 187 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 68 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 51 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 39 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 37 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 26 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 25 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 19 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 6 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 54 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




37 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
10399 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 38,040 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 10961 | 29% |
| Smokes | 12664 | 33% |
| HE Grenades | 5811 | 15% |
| Molotovs | 8604 | 23% |
Our logs show you have wasted $3,048,105 of utility $131 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 269 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | JiggleMyJax˘◡˘ | 52% | 318 |
| #2 | vyzzen | 51% | 141 |
| #3 | GurK1s H0nd | 51% | 572 |
| #4 | butcher | 50% | 208 |
| #5 | AnilAbi | 50% | 471 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ✪ Goliath Clash.gg | 27 | 0.0045 |
| #2 | GurK1s H0nd | 15 | 0.0012 |
| #3 | AnilAbi | 13 | 0.0013 |
| #4 | vyzzen | 13 | 0.0044 |
| #5 | zPrimez | 10 | 0.0027 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | AnilAbi | 926 | 0.09 | 22 min |
| #2 | GurK1s H0nd | 804 | 0.07 | 20 min |
| #3 | ✪ Goliath Clash.gg | 534 | 0.09 | 16 min |
| #4 | butcher | 456 | 0.11 | 10 min |
| #5 | vyzzen | 434 | 0.15 | 8 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | JeyP252 | +1.75 | 84 | 69 |
| #2 | GurK1s H0nd | +1.19 | 83 | 62 |
| #3 | vyzzen | +1.11 | 85 | 53 |
| #4 | Happy | +1.07 | 79 | 61 |
| #5 | JiggleMyJax˘◡˘ | +0.22 | 83 | 35 |





