








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 172 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 58 matches | ||
| Premier | 12 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 8 different maps





Our logs show 4 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




7 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1090 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 3,768 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 781 | 21% |
| Smokes | 1067 | 28% |
| HE Grenades | 1055 | 28% |
| Molotovs | 865 | 23% |
Our logs show you have wasted $270,554 of utility $127 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 61 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Frag0r | 100% | 5 |
| #2 | nct | 83% | 6 |
| #3 | Bisso | 71% | 7 |
| #4 | element | 68% | 22 |
| #5 | fakeme | 61% | 36 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #15 | fyq | 47% | 19 |
| #16 | Danyio | 47% | 17 |
| #17 | meric4l | 45% | 11 |
| #18 | Grizi | 44% | 16 |
| #19 | xix | 43% | 7 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | fakeme | 2 | 0.0025 |
| #2 | GENjiii~ | 1 | 0.0014 |
| #3 | Danyio | 1 | 0.0024 |
| #4 | fyq | 1 | 0.0024 |
| #5 | Grizi | 1 | 0.0028 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | fakeme | 116 | 0.15 | 3 min |
| #2 | GENjiii~ | 112 | 0.15 | 3 min |
| #3 | fyq | 103 | 0.25 | 3 min |
| #4 | kck- | 95 | 0.19 | 2 min |
| #5 | Erik Zion | 54 | 0.14 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Leif | +2.05 | 83 | 66 |
| #2 | fakeme | +1.78 | 80 | 70 |
| #3 | nct | +1.48 | 57 | 74 |
| #4 | Johann Lafer | +1.05 | 74 | 56 |
| #5 | kck- | +1.02 | 82 | 70 |





