








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1178 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 430 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 44 matches | ||
| Wingman | 21 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Golden | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 13 different maps





Our logs show 57 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




55 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4783 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 13,559 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2319 | 17% |
| Smokes | 2793 | 21% |
| HE Grenades | 5302 | 39% |
| Molotovs | 3145 | 23% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,552,879 of utility $211 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 495 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ✪$orry✪ | 49% | 37 |
| #2 | MayaPapaya | 48% | 60 |
| #3 | Basti sucht sein Aim | 48% | 113 |
| #4 | airicF | 45% | 69 |
| #5 | Cuntdestroyer_69 | 41% | 79 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | airicF | 16 | 0.0118 |
| #2 | Basti sucht sein Aim | 9 | 0.0038 |
| #3 | ü 16 guppy | 7 | 0.0046 |
| #4 | Cuntdestroyer_69 | 6 | 0.0035 |
| #5 | nero | 3 | 0.0029 |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Rexlity.- | +2.14 | 71 | 54 |
| #2 | Basti sucht sein Aim | +1.77 | 68 | 68 |
| #3 | airicF | +1.13 | 61 | 72 |
| #4 | ü 16 guppy | -0.03 | 59 | 65 |
| #5 | nero | -0.39 | 49 | 67 |





