








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 124 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 41 matches | ||
| Wingman | 18 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 3 matches | ||
| Faceit | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 23 different maps





Our logs show 9 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




6 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1397 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 5,950 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1452 | 24% |
| Smokes | 1495 | 25% |
| HE Grenades | 1560 | 26% |
| Molotovs | 1443 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $497,543 of utility $123 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 8 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Dexy | 45% | 11 |
| #2 | Teimo | 42% | 12 |
| #3 | KiiWij | 39% | 28 |
| #4 | Banskq | 37% | 110 |
| #5 | eellma | 36% | 11 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #4 | Banskq | 37% | 110 |
| #5 | eellma | 36% | 11 |
| #6 | Manatser | 32% | 28 |
| #7 | JooPaJoo | 25% | 16 |
| #8 | nasse :-D | 11% | 19 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Banskq | 4 | 0.0019 |
| #2 | KiiWij | 3 | 0.0050 |
| #3 | Manatser | 3 | 0.0052 |
| #4 | Teimo | 2 | 0.0078 |
| #5 | Dexy | 1 | 0.0044 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Banskq | 351 | 0.17 | 10 min |
| #2 | KiiWij | 110 | 0.18 | 3 min |
| #3 | Manatser | 102 | 0.18 | 2 min |
| #4 | Teimo | 41 | 0.16 | 1 min |
| #5 | JooPaJoo | 36 | 0.12 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Teimo | +5.47 | 68 | 65 |
| #2 | Dexy | +2.75 | 53 | 64 |
| #3 | KiiWij | +1.15 | 66 | 69 |
| #4 | Banskq | -0.88 | 64 | 72 |
| #5 | Con | -1.00 | 63 | 52 |





