








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1063 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Wingman | 464 matches | ||
| Premier | 328 matches | ||
| Faceit | 325 matches | ||
| Renown | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 17 different maps





Our logs show 36 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




15 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
8084 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 39,177 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 8160 | 21% |
| Smokes | 13088 | 33% |
| HE Grenades | 9985 | 25% |
| Molotovs | 7944 | 20% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,491,268 of utility $67 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 529 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Iceman | 56% | 70 |
| #2 | Kobbii | 55% | 76 |
| #3 | ' Kínbúi | 52% | 69 |
| #4 | Murkur | 51% | 85 |
| #5 | ScareCrow <1nf3ct> | 42% | 209 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Iceman | 56% | 70 |
| #2 | Kobbii | 55% | 76 |
| #3 | ' Kínbúi | 52% | 69 |
| #4 | Murkur | 51% | 85 |
| #5 | ScareCrow <1nf3ct> | 42% | 209 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Murkur | 6 | 0.0034 |
| #2 | ScareCrow <1nf3ct> | 3 | 0.0008 |
| #3 | Kobbii | 1 | 0.0006 |
| #4 | ' Kínbúi | 1 | 0.0007 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ScareCrow <1nf3ct> | 763 | 0.19 | 20 min |
| #2 | Iceman | 206 | 0.14 | 6 min |
| #3 | Murkur | 185 | 0.11 | 5 min |
| #4 | Kobbii | 185 | 0.11 | 4 min |
| #5 | ' Kínbúi | 152 | 0.11 | 4 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Kobbii | +1.42 | 58 | 54 |
| #2 | Iceman | +0.93 | 68 | 70 |
| #3 | Murkur | +0.46 | 62 | 72 |
| #4 | ScareCrow <1nf3ct> | +0.36 | 72 | 72 |
| #5 | Xtazy <1nf3ct> | +0.10 | 60 | 59 |





