








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 631 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Esplay | 86 matches | 1,934 | |
| Faceit | 29 matches | ||
| Premier | 13 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 23 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




4 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1596 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 6,279 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1967 | 31% |
| Smokes | 1773 | 28% |
| HE Grenades | 1375 | 22% |
| Molotovs | 1164 | 19% |
Our logs show you have wasted $519,562 of utility $172 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 226 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | che | 2 | 0.0024 |
| #2 | disco dreigen | 1 | 0.0004 |
| #3 | kELSO | 1 | 0.0008 |
| #4 | broderpimp69 | 1 | 0.0015 |
| #5 | kongla | 1 | 0.0015 |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | STH ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ | +3.14 | 61 | 68 |
| #2 | BRUNO | +2.66 | 60 | 80 |
| #3 | Housewally | +1.09 | 69 | 70 |
| #4 | matsdf | +0.97 | 76 | 64 |
| #5 | disco dreigen | +0.70 | 68 | 70 |





