








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 12 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 10 matches | ||
| Premier | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 5 matches | ||
| Wingman | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 13 different maps





Our logs show 2 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




3 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
612 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 1,692 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 346 | 20% |
| Smokes | 557 | 33% |
| HE Grenades | 445 | 26% |
| Molotovs | 344 | 20% |
Our logs show you have wasted $418,231 of utility $205 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 6 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | NAP | 55% | 11 |
| #2 | ☁ Pirate | 47% | 55 |
| #3 | ThaiTea | 47% | 34 |
| #4 | Beefger.exe | 46% | 35 |
| #5 | Blue | 46% | 70 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | ThaiTea | 47% | 34 |
| #4 | Beefger.exe | 46% | 35 |
| #5 | Blue | 46% | 70 |
| #6 | Mang Tomas | 42% | 52 |
| #7 | Greg | 29% | 7 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Mang Tomas | 3 | 0.0029 |
| #2 | ☁ Pirate | 2 | 0.0019 |
| #3 | NAP | 1 | 0.0043 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ☁ Pirate | 311 | 0.29 | 8 min |
| #2 | Blue | 202 | 0.14 | 6 min |
| #3 | ThaiTea | 184 | 0.26 | 5 min |
| #4 | Mang Tomas | 179 | 0.17 | 5 min |
| #5 | Greg | 41 | 0.29 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ☁ Pirate | +3.16 | 85 | 68 |
| #2 | Greg | +2.41 | 52 | 79 |
| #3 | ThaiTea | +1.21 | 73 | 72 |
| #4 | NAP | +0.52 | 50 | 65 |
| #5 | Blue | -0.04 | 52 | 63 |





