










System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 546 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 113 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 8 different maps





Our logs show 13 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




2 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1668 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 2,391 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 164 | 7% |
| Smokes | 815 | 34% |
| HE Grenades | 778 | 33% |
| Molotovs | 634 | 27% |
Our logs show you have wasted $774,154 of utility $236 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 70 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Gonky | 56% | 16 |
| #2 | Chaka | 55% | 11 |
| #3 | Stew Stew | 53% | 125 |
| #4 | MikeWhoCheeseHarry | 51% | 123 |
| #5 | theMFR | 26% | 19 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Gonky | 56% | 16 |
| #2 | Chaka | 55% | 11 |
| #3 | Stew Stew | 53% | 125 |
| #4 | MikeWhoCheeseHarry | 51% | 123 |
| #5 | theMFR | 26% | 19 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | MikeWhoCheeseHarry | 6 | 0.0023 |
| #2 | Stew Stew | 5 | 0.0019 |
| #3 | Gonky | 4 | 0.0124 |
| #4 | theMFR | 2 | 0.0048 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | MikeWhoCheeseHarry | 334 | 0.13 | 8 min |
| #2 | Stew Stew | 227 | 0.09 | 5 min |
| #3 | theMFR | 65 | 0.16 | 2 min |
| #4 | Gonky | 40 | 0.12 | 1 min |
| #5 | Chaka | 3 | 0.01 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Gonky | +3.94 | 84 | 65 |
| #2 | Battle Droid | +3.08 | 84 | 34 |
| #3 | theMFR | +0.07 | 69 | 50 |
| #4 | Stew Stew | -1.37 | 36 | 54 |
| #5 | MikeWhoCheeseHarry | -2.10 | 50 | 53 |





