








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 860 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 542 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 9 matches | ||
| Wingman | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 2 matches | ||
| Faceit | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 19 different maps





Our logs show 71 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




18 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
5926 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 21,214 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 7869 | 37% |
| Smokes | 4775 | 23% |
| HE Grenades | 5165 | 24% |
| Molotovs | 3405 | 16% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,504,710 of utility $176 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 345 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | LSReh | 59% | 51 |
| #2 | =[Bl4ckF1r3]= | 51% | 189 |
| #3 | Talahon | 51% | 235 |
| #4 | King_ismet2001 | 48% | 185 |
| #5 | Ottchen- | 46% | 41 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #8 | SeanLP | 44% | 93 |
| #9 | Marichino | 43% | 226 |
| #10 | Kahli | 42% | 38 |
| #11 | Werbeagent | 39% | 36 |
| #12 | Moon ☾ | 35% | 119 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | .silas | 8 | 0.0015 |
| #2 | Moon ☾ | 8 | 0.0032 |
| #3 | SeanLP | 8 | 0.0041 |
| #4 | Talahon | 7 | 0.0014 |
| #5 | King_ismet2001 | 5 | 0.0013 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | .silas | 1113 | 0.21 | 34 min |
| #2 | Talahon | 778 | 0.16 | 22 min |
| #3 | King_ismet2001 | 543 | 0.14 | 15 min |
| #4 | Moon ☾ | 321 | 0.13 | 8 min |
| #5 | SeanLP | 288 | 0.15 | 8 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Talahon | +2.41 | 61 | 71 |
| #2 | King_ismet2001 | +2.18 | 61 | 68 |
| #3 | k3ppi | +0.24 | 62 | 68 |
| #4 | Moon ☾ | +0.06 | 71 | 54 |
| #5 | .silas | -0.13 | 80 | 64 |





