








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 400 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 362 matches | ||
| Faceit | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 2 matches | ||
| Wingman | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Jura | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 16 different maps





Our logs show 13 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




3 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3511 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 8,665 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1251 | 14% |
| Smokes | 2427 | 28% |
| HE Grenades | 2496 | 29% |
| Molotovs | 2491 | 29% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,216,037 of utility $135 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 44 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | King_ismet2001 | 57% | 37 |
| #2 | Tscharlez Leklärck | 57% | 30 |
| #3 | Talahon | 54% | 92 |
| #4 | Moon ☾ | 53% | 59 |
| #5 | Shisha HB | 51% | 63 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #8 | .silas | 46% | 169 |
| #9 | Ottchen- | 45% | 49 |
| #10 | Marichino | 43% | 53 |
| #11 | Werbeagent | 43% | 30 |
| #12 | LSReh | 39% | 82 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | k3ppi | 7 | 0.0018 |
| #2 | Moon ☾ | 5 | 0.0043 |
| #3 | Ottchen- | 3 | 0.0032 |
| #4 | .silas | 2 | 0.0006 |
| #5 | Talahon | 2 | 0.0011 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | k3ppi | 891 | 0.23 | 29 min |
| #2 | .silas | 685 | 0.20 | 21 min |
| #3 | Talahon | 301 | 0.16 | 8 min |
| #4 | Moon ☾ | 200 | 0.17 | 5 min |
| #5 | Tscharlez Leklärck | 158 | 0.25 | 5 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Mr_Bubatz | +4.24 | 92 | 73 |
| #2 | Talahon | +3.27 | 60 | 71 |
| #3 | King_ismet2001 | +2.99 | 56 | 70 |
| #4 | Tscharlez Leklärck | +1.12 | 57 | 69 |
| #5 | k3ppi | +0.90 | 62 | 69 |





