








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1089 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 719 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 73 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 29 matches | ||
| Faceit | 25 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 21 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 17 matches | ||
| Wingman | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Agency | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 18 different maps





Our logs show 78 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




120 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
10631 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 31,614 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 9667 | 31% |
| Smokes | 8278 | 26% |
| HE Grenades | 8138 | 26% |
| Molotovs | 5531 | 17% |
Our logs show you have wasted $3,743,575 of utility $185 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 1066 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | syz | 53% | 132 |
| #2 | Breeze | 51% | 80 |
| #3 | Luka | 49% | 136 |
| #4 | Chu4Lyfe | 48% | 124 |
| #5 | Saint | 47% | 55 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Chu4Lyfe | 633 | 0.24 | 19 min |
| #2 | syz | 387 | 0.14 | 9 min |
| #3 | Luka | 369 | 0.13 | 14 min |
| #4 | Saint | 246 | 0.19 | 7 min |
| #5 | Breeze | 30 | 0.02 | 0 min |





