








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 984 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 630 matches | ||
| Faceit | 87 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 6 matches | ||
| Wingman | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 38 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




24 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
8853 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 25,345 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 4999 | 20% |
| Smokes | 8822 | 35% |
| HE Grenades | 5898 | 23% |
| Molotovs | 5626 | 22% |
Our logs show you have wasted $3,703,999 of utility $213 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 1162 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Breeze | 52% | 158 |
| #2 | Chu4Lyfe | 52% | 519 |
| #3 | O_O | 49% | 136 |
| #4 | ISIS | Zaytoven | 47% | 162 |
| #5 | =(^.^)= 7ckngmad | 47% | 158 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | Chu4Lyfe | 52% | 519 |
| #3 | O_O | 49% | 136 |
| #4 | ISIS | Zaytoven | 47% | 162 |
| #5 | =(^.^)= 7ckngmad | 47% | 158 |
| #6 | ignis | 42% | 98 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ISIS | Zaytoven | 14 | 0.0042 |
| #2 | Chu4Lyfe | 12 | 0.0011 |
| #3 | O_O | 12 | 0.0041 |
| #4 | ignis | 12 | 0.0058 |
| #5 | Breeze | 6 | 0.0017 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Chu4Lyfe | 2798 | 0.25 | 87 min |
| #2 | =(^.^)= 7ckngmad | 528 | 0.16 | 14 min |
| #3 | O_O | 411 | 0.14 | 9 min |
| #4 | ignis | 294 | 0.14 | 6 min |
| #5 | ISIS | Zaytoven | 289 | 0.09 | 8 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Luka | +1.15 | 77 | 71 |
| #2 | Breeze | +0.20 | 74 | 37 |
| #3 | Chu4Lyfe | -0.27 | 64 | 79 |
| #4 | =(^.^)= 7ckngmad | -0.66 | 59 | 73 |
| #5 | O_O | -0.86 | 63 | 58 |





