








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 713 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Dust2 | 62 matches | ||
| Premier | 49 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 29 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 25 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 24 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 22 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 19 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 7 matches | ||
| Wingman | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Golden | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 21 different maps





Our logs show 14 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




52 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3692 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 11,916 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 4067 | 34% |
| Smokes | 2907 | 24% |
| HE Grenades | 2746 | 23% |
| Molotovs | 2196 | 18% |
Our logs show you have wasted $806,161 of utility $114 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 256 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | gonzo | 58% | 111 |
| #2 | kubee | 56% | 160 |
| #3 | kungfuhamster32 | 52% | 134 |
| #4 | Muscle Mommmy | 52% | 23 |
| #5 | KermitTehFroug | 50% | 117 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | gonzo | 43 | 0.0195 |
| #2 | OpticXjr. | 13 | 0.0110 |
| #3 | KermitTehFroug | 10 | 0.0042 |
| #4 | kungfuhamster32 | 8 | 0.0030 |
| #5 | Jonald | 7 | 0.0056 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | kungfuhamster32 | 470 | 0.18 | 11 min |
| #2 | Jonald | 445 | 0.35 | 10 min |
| #3 | KermitTehFroug | 290 | 0.12 | 8 min |
| #4 | gonzo | 241 | 0.11 | 5 min |
| #5 | kubee | 237 | 0.08 | 6 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ✪ Pythius | +2.75 | 68 | 65 |
| #2 | gonzo | +1.88 | 67 | 54 |
| #3 | KermitTehFroug | +1.35 | 72 | 63 |
| #4 | kungfuhamster32 | +0.66 | 53 | 50 |
| #5 | kubee | +0.54 | 44 | 64 |





