








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 309 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Anubis | 28 matches | ||
| Premier | 27 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 25 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 21 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 19 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 8 matches | ||
| Faceit | 2 matches | ||
| Wingman | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 13 different maps





Our logs show 22 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




6 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2067 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 10,348 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3951 | 38% |
| Smokes | 1988 | 19% |
| HE Grenades | 2984 | 29% |
| Molotovs | 1425 | 14% |
Our logs show you have wasted $529,885 of utility $116 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 152 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Yanks | 60% | 20 |
| #2 | el flosho | 57% | 37 |
| #3 | Christiandus | 53% | 47 |
| #4 | Vednic | 50% | 14 |
| #5 | sH0tya | 43% | 23 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Yanks | 60% | 20 |
| #2 | el flosho | 57% | 37 |
| #3 | Christiandus | 53% | 47 |
| #4 | Vednic | 50% | 14 |
| #5 | sH0tya | 43% | 23 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Christiandus | 5 | 0.0050 |
| #2 | el flosho | 3 | 0.0043 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Christiandus | 129 | 0.13 | 3 min |
| #2 | el flosho | 75 | 0.11 | 1 min |
| #3 | Vednic | 57 | 0.28 | 2 min |
| #4 | Yanks | 48 | 0.11 | 1 min |
| #5 | sH0tya | 20 | 0.05 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Vednic | +5.99 | 90 | 74 |
| #2 | Yanks | +2.68 | 78 | 67 |
| #3 | Christiandus | +0.80 | 48 | 55 |
| #4 | el flosho | +0.38 | 74 | 59 |
| #5 | Läuft! | +0.30 | 54 | 77 |





