








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 11 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 271 matches | ||
| Faceit | 60 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 8 different maps





Our logs show 38 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




16 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3216 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 13,465 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2722 | 20% |
| Smokes | 3686 | 27% |
| HE Grenades | 3527 | 26% |
| Molotovs | 3530 | 26% |
Our logs show you have wasted $906,395 of utility $115 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 82 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #16 | PainFull | 47% | 45 |
| #17 | chris | 46% | 92 |
| #18 | nAsty | 44% | 34 |
| #19 | ph17 | 40% | 20 |
| #20 | jodeljunky | 38% | 39 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | moww | 7 | 0.0031 |
| #2 | jodeljunky | 4 | 0.0049 |
| #3 | spiN | 3 | 0.0014 |
| #4 | chris | 3 | 0.0015 |
| #5 | PainFull | 3 | 0.0032 |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Baum | +3.21 | 75 | 70 |
| #2 | papa 2rzo | +2.10 | 70 | 65 |
| #3 | sk | +2.00 | 77 | 64 |
| #4 | synax | +1.98 | 81 | 55 |
| #5 | ph17 | +1.92 | 72 | 74 |





