








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 252 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 250 matches | ||
| Premier | 70 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 8 matches | ||
| Wingman | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 17 different maps





Our logs show 6 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




34 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4121 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 9,621 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2003 | 21% |
| Smokes | 2832 | 29% |
| HE Grenades | 2320 | 24% |
| Molotovs | 2466 | 26% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,861,607 of utility $200 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 306 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | FnK | 60% | 30 |
| #2 | L?ckY | 59% | 27 |
| #3 | PC Principal | 56% | 102 |
| #4 | DAE MELVIN | 55% | 22 |
| #5 | Pryzed | 54% | 312 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #7 | FlorianPlays | 49% | 104 |
| #8 | Passi | 49% | 408 |
| #9 | Turbofuss | 46% | 90 |
| #10 | Kapitän zur See | 42% | 90 |
| #11 | SYNEKOSAURUS REX | 42% | 36 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Passi | 17 | 0.0019 |
| #2 | PC Principal | 8 | 0.0037 |
| #3 | Pryzed | 5 | 0.0007 |
| #4 | .TreppG | 3 | 0.0013 |
| #5 | Kapitän zur See | 3 | 0.0015 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Passi | 766 | 0.09 | 17 min |
| #2 | Pryzed | 594 | 0.09 | 15 min |
| #3 | FlorianPlays | 507 | 0.22 | 15 min |
| #4 | Kapitän zur See | 485 | 0.25 | 10 min |
| #5 | .TreppG | 260 | 0.12 | 7 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | L?ckY | +1.69 | 52 | 69 |
| #2 | .TreppG | +1.38 | 81 | 60 |
| #3 | Pfannekuchen_Heinz | +1.17 | 75 | 52 |
| #4 | Pryzed | +0.89 | 77 | 55 |
| #5 | FnK | +0.77 | 82 | 53 |





