








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 214 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September


The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 58 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 3 matches | ||
| Wingman | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show 12 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




2 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
927 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 1,969 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 192 | 10% |
| Smokes | 703 | 36% |
| HE Grenades | 655 | 33% |
| Molotovs | 419 | 21% |
Our logs show you have wasted $336,630 of utility $118 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 43 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #8 | ✪ Slone ツ | 50% | 68 |
| #9 | Cute R0bder-kun | 45% | 40 |
| #10 | Tobarschius | 42% | 69 |
| #11 | roibron | 36% | 39 |
| #12 | Schlechte Gewohnheiten 8 | 30% | 10 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ✪ Slone ツ | 8 | 0.0056 |
| #2 | Tobarschius | 5 | 0.0033 |
| #3 | Cold as Ice | 5 | 0.0059 |
| #4 | Cute R0bder-kun | 4 | 0.0049 |
| #5 | Patroklaus | 3 | 0.0026 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Tobarschius | 244 | 0.16 | 6 min |
| #2 | ✪ Slone ツ | 202 | 0.14 | 6 min |
| #3 | roibron | 165 | 0.19 | 4 min |
| #4 | Cold as Ice | 139 | 0.17 | 4 min |
| #5 | Cute R0bder-kun | 115 | 0.14 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Cute R0bder-kun | +3.39 | 71 | 71 |
| #2 | Patroklaus | +2.17 | 51 | 57 |
| #3 | Tobarschius | +2.15 | 71 | 70 |
| #4 | Schlechte Gewohnheiten 8 | +1.08 | 32 | 67 |
| #5 | EinsOkr1m | +0.80 | 77 | 72 |





