








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 670 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 519 matches | ||
| Premier | 293 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 4 matches | ||
| Wingman | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Edin | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 37 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




14 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4106 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 14,465 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1079 | 7% |
| Smokes | 2854 | 20% |
| HE Grenades | 5267 | 36% |
| Molotovs | 5265 | 36% |
Our logs show you have wasted $6,450,540 of utility $327 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 802 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | plove. | 55% | 251 |
| #2 | Nielot WIN.SKIN | 54% | 59 |
| #3 | Bacardi | 51% | 138 |
| #4 | Glorbo frutto drillo | 51% | 79 |
| #5 | Winter | 50% | 115 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Bacardi | 19 | 0.0066 |
| #2 | Glorbo frutto drillo | 16 | 0.0098 |
| #3 | Pingwido bandido | 15 | 0.0009 |
| #4 | Cappuccino Assassino | 14 | 0.0013 |
| #5 | Crouch | 12 | 0.0023 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Pingwido bandido | 1161 | 0.07 | 28 min |
| #2 | Stanton PL | 798 | 0.14 | 19 min |
| #3 | plove. | 669 | 0.12 | 20 min |
| #4 | Cappuccino Assassino | 457 | 0.04 | 13 min |
| #5 | Glorbo frutto drillo | 380 | 0.23 | 9 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Glorbo frutto drillo | +7.79 | 79 | 59 |
| #2 | plove. | +6.75 | 87 | 76 |
| #3 | Nielot WIN.SKIN | +6.47 | 72 | 65 |
| #4 | repan | +3.51 | 72 | 40 |
| #5 | Bacardi | +2.56 | 73 | 60 |





