








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 338 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 421 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 2 matches | ||
| Wingman | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 24 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




7 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4381 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 12,245 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2268 | 19% |
| Smokes | 3675 | 30% |
| HE Grenades | 3313 | 27% |
| Molotovs | 2989 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,906,638 of utility $190 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 135 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Shkronkle | 54% | 26 |
| #2 | holy guacamole | 53% | 238 |
| #3 | FluxZ | 53% | 93 |
| #4 | Hohenberger | 51% | 235 |
| #5 | EBITDA | 50% | 346 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | EBITDA | 7 | 0.0010 |
| #2 | holy guacamole | 7 | 0.0014 |
| #3 | SpectralOwl | 6 | 0.0006 |
| #4 | Hohenberger | 5 | 0.0010 |
| #5 | Meow Zedong | 3 | 0.0011 |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Didlo | +1.50 | 74 | 59 |
| #2 | EBITDA | +1.23 | 67 | 60 |
| #3 | FluxZ | +1.18 | 71 | 63 |
| #4 | holy guacamole | +0.49 | 80 | 48 |
| #5 | Meow Zedong | -0.16 | 80 | 49 |





