








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1318 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 171 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 124 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 107 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 98 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 95 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 95 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 82 matches | ||
| Faceit | 44 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 41 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 26 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 18 matches | ||
| Wingman | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 20 different maps





Our logs show 78 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




197 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
8336 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 29,296 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 6612 | 23% |
| Smokes | 7589 | 26% |
| HE Grenades | 7806 | 27% |
| Molotovs | 7289 | 25% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,660,677 of utility $137 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 2448 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | phzaza | 60% | 81 |
| #2 | Turbo Tax | 59% | 66 |
| #3 | Therman | 54% | 180 |
| #4 | p0se | 52% | 787 |
| #5 | nakdJake | 51% | 472 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | Turbo Tax | 59% | 66 |
| #3 | Therman | 54% | 180 |
| #4 | p0se | 52% | 787 |
| #5 | nakdJake | 51% | 472 |
| #6 | KYAL | 48% | 89 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | p0se | 151 | 0.0097 |
| #2 | nakdJake | 53 | 0.0057 |
| #3 | KYAL | 30 | 0.0160 |
| #4 | Therman | 16 | 0.0045 |
| #5 | phzaza | 8 | 0.0047 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | p0se | 1201 | 0.08 | 37 min |
| #2 | nakdJake | 833 | 0.09 | 20 min |
| #3 | Therman | 688 | 0.19 | 15 min |
| #4 | KYAL | 440 | 0.23 | 12 min |
| #5 | Turbo Tax | 238 | 0.18 | 5 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Therman | +3.66 | 79 | 67 |
| #2 | KYAL | +2.63 | 78 | 61 |
| #3 | p0se | +2.44 | 90 | 52 |
| #4 | phzaza | +1.54 | 67 | 65 |
| #5 | Pugdog | +0.76 | 58 | 59 |





