








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 247 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 82 matches | ||
| Faceit | 24 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 24 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




4 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1259 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 7,709 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1500 | 19% |
| Smokes | 2130 | 28% |
| HE Grenades | 2297 | 30% |
| Molotovs | 1782 | 23% |
Our logs show you have wasted $505,812 of utility $141 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 39 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | pibli | 53% | 79 |
| #2 | Kiisub | 53% | 134 |
| #3 | KärrrGJ | 51% | 82 |
| #4 | smul | 49% | 118 |
| #5 | Zonni | 47% | 64 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | smul | 5 | 0.0020 |
| #2 | Kiisub | 3 | 0.0011 |
| #3 | pibli | 2 | 0.0012 |
| #4 | viidakkojimi | 1 | 0.0005 |
| #5 | KärrrGJ | 1 | 0.0006 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Kiisub | 804 | 0.29 | 24 min |
| #2 | smul | 404 | 0.16 | 10 min |
| #3 | pibli | 214 | 0.13 | 6 min |
| #4 | viidakkojimi | 202 | 0.10 | 4 min |
| #5 | KärrrGJ | 146 | 0.09 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | viidakkojimi | +0.85 | 69 | 65 |
| #2 | Kiisub | +0.51 | 64 | 83 |
| #3 | Nalle Naistenmies | +0.07 | 65 | 76 |
| #4 | smul | -0.20 | 69 | 75 |
| #5 | pibli | -0.35 | 77 | 69 |





