








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 222 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Dust2 | 102 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 13 matches | ||
| Premier | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 9 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




6 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2065 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 4,405 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1569 | 36% |
| Smokes | 600 | 14% |
| HE Grenades | 1177 | 27% |
| Molotovs | 1059 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $344,800 of utility $102 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 13 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #9 | ♕demon♕ | 60% | 15 |
| #10 | | 60% | 20 |
| #11 | Shretla | 58% | 60 |
| #12 | Ben246813 | 50% | 16 |
| #13 | trash cunt | 45% | 11 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ethical bum sniffer | 6 | 0.0032 |
| #2 | Shretla | 6 | 0.0049 |
| #3 | sun | 4 | 0.0149 |
| #4 | Ray White - The Problem | 3 | 0.0019 |
| #5 | socks | 3 | 0.0075 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ethical bum sniffer | 216 | 0.11 | 7 min |
| #2 | Shretla | 154 | 0.13 | 3 min |
| #3 | L3monlime | 106 | 0.11 | 3 min |
| #4 | Ray White - The Problem | 87 | 0.06 | 2 min |
| #5 | sun | 49 | 0.18 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | sun | +4.45 | 87 | 72 |
| #2 | L3monlime | +4.37 | 84 | 71 |
| #3 | Ben246813 | +3.79 | 79 | 62 |
| #4 | ★DNSWorld★AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA | +3.35 | 69 | 48 |
| #5 | | +2.38 | 86 | 57 |





