








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 46 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Nuke | 44 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 12 matches | ||
| Premier | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 3 matches | ||
| Wingman | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Edin | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 20 different maps





Our logs show 1 Chicken Has been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




6 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
995 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 4,494 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 245 | 5% |
| Smokes | 1187 | 26% |
| HE Grenades | 1801 | 40% |
| Molotovs | 1261 | 28% |
Our logs show you have wasted $136,484 of utility $46 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 7 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | punisher pigik | 52% | 145 |
| #2 | StBrStroj | 52% | 21 |
| #3 | Izack May DeSmurf | 51% | 105 |
| #4 | ImNotBad | 51% | 85 |
| #5 | garfield | 41% | 29 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | punisher pigik | 52% | 145 |
| #2 | StBrStroj | 52% | 21 |
| #3 | Izack May DeSmurf | 51% | 105 |
| #4 | ImNotBad | 51% | 85 |
| #5 | garfield | 41% | 29 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | punisher pigik | 7 | 0.0024 |
| #2 | ImNotBad | 3 | 0.0017 |
| #3 | garfield | 3 | 0.0053 |
| #4 | StBrStroj | 2 | 0.0049 |
| #5 | Izack May DeSmurf | 1 | 0.0005 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Izack May DeSmurf | 169 | 0.08 | 5 min |
| #2 | punisher pigik | 132 | 0.05 | 2 min |
| #3 | ImNotBad | 78 | 0.05 | 1 min |
| #4 | garfield | 36 | 0.06 | 1 min |
| #5 | StBrStroj | 4 | 0.01 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | daewo3 | +1.69 | 51 | 45 |
| #2 | punisher pigik | +0.20 | 45 | 42 |
| #3 | ImNotBad | -1.02 | 33 | 47 |
| #4 | garfield | -1.87 | 30 | 30 |
| #5 | Izack May DeSmurf | -2.27 | 28 | 46 |





