








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 485 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 272 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 3 matches | ||
| Faceit | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 39 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




9 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3017 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 9,295 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2384 | 26% |
| Smokes | 2432 | 26% |
| HE Grenades | 2204 | 24% |
| Molotovs | 2275 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,678,229 of utility $231 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 325 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | joshgc | 59% | 44 |
| #2 | jester | 57% | 30 |
| #3 | JeBipp | 56% | 25 |
| #4 | rsaavy | 55% | 22 |
| #5 | pat | 55% | 22 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #10 | san1ty[st] | 46% | 28 |
| #11 | daddybeef [oxy] | 43% | 54 |
| #12 | ChickenWangz | 39% | 18 |
| #13 | LordLongWeiner | 39% | 18 |
| #14 | Ciguato | 39% | 31 |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | joshgc | +2.09 | 76 | 53 |
| #2 | Ciguato | +1.78 | 63 | 71 |
| #3 | Monty | +1.78 | 58 | 59 |
| #4 | givy | +1.54 | 83 | 60 |
| #5 | rsaavy | +0.98 | 66 | 58 |





