










System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 502 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Dust2 | 106 matches | ||
| Premier | 75 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 61 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 58 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 54 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 34 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 30 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 29 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 3 matches | ||
| Faceit | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 68 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




17 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3474 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 11,633 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3119 | 27% |
| Smokes | 4049 | 35% |
| HE Grenades | 2547 | 22% |
| Molotovs | 1918 | 16% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,227,863 of utility $128 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 622 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | quesakilla | 76% | 49 |
| #2 | skipp | 65% | 119 |
| #3 | Prahl | 61% | 126 |
| #4 | Prof. Skurlington III PhD. Esq. | 57% | 202 |
| #5 | King of The Trees | 57% | 292 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | Prahl | 61% | 126 |
| #4 | Prof. Skurlington III PhD. Esq. | 57% | 202 |
| #5 | King of The Trees | 57% | 292 |
| #6 | slick | 54% | 24 |
| #7 | Tmini76 | 49% | 35 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Prof. Skurlington III PhD. Esq. | 11 | 0.0027 |
| #2 | King of The Trees | 10 | 0.0017 |
| #3 | quesakilla | 6 | 0.0062 |
| #4 | skipp | 4 | 0.0017 |
| #5 | Tmini76 | 1 | 0.0014 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Prof. Skurlington III PhD. Esq. | 670 | 0.16 | 18 min |
| #2 | King of The Trees | 500 | 0.09 | 14 min |
| #3 | Prahl | 259 | 0.10 | 7 min |
| #4 | skipp | 239 | 0.10 | 7 min |
| #5 | quesakilla | 181 | 0.19 | 6 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | quesakilla | +6.10 | 88 | 67 |
| #2 | skipp | +3.52 | 86 | 61 |
| #3 | King of The Trees | +1.30 | 79 | 62 |
| #4 | astronawf | +0.98 | 58 | 55 |
| #5 | Prahl | -0.83 | 47 | 51 |





