










System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 362 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September



The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Dust2 | 21 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 20 matches | ||
| Premier | 19 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 7 different maps





Our logs show 11 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




2 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
994 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 2,516 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 474 | 19% |
| Smokes | 796 | 32% |
| HE Grenades | 842 | 33% |
| Molotovs | 404 | 16% |
Our logs show you have wasted $347,589 of utility $123 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 49 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | quesakilla | 50% | 40 |
| #2 | astronawf | 49% | 35 |
| #3 | skipp | 48% | 77 |
| #4 | King of The Trees | 45% | 108 |
| #5 | Prof. Skurlington III PhD. Esq. | 42% | 36 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | quesakilla | 50% | 40 |
| #2 | astronawf | 49% | 35 |
| #3 | skipp | 48% | 77 |
| #4 | King of The Trees | 45% | 108 |
| #5 | Prof. Skurlington III PhD. Esq. | 42% | 36 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | skipp | 4 | 0.0024 |
| #2 | astronawf | 3 | 0.0041 |
| #3 | quesakilla | 2 | 0.0023 |
| #4 | Prof. Skurlington III PhD. Esq. | 2 | 0.0026 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | King of The Trees | 229 | 0.10 | 7 min |
| #2 | skipp | 155 | 0.09 | 4 min |
| #3 | quesakilla | 142 | 0.16 | 4 min |
| #4 | Prof. Skurlington III PhD. Esq. | 106 | 0.14 | 3 min |
| #5 | astronawf | 106 | 0.15 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | quesakilla | +5.44 | 85 | 68 |
| #2 | skipp | +2.40 | 84 | 62 |
| #3 | King of The Trees | -0.56 | 79 | 61 |
| #4 | astronawf | -0.73 | 61 | 52 |
| #5 | Tmini76 | -2.15 | 55 | 46 |





