








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 289 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September

The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 246 matches | ||
| Wingman | 7 matches | ||
| Faceit | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show 41 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




5 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1782 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 8,435 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1101 | 13% |
| Smokes | 3144 | 37% |
| HE Grenades | 1828 | 22% |
| Molotovs | 2362 | 28% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,491,770 of utility $228 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 196 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #6 | schib | 47% | 19 |
| #7 | JojoS | 46% | 63 |
| #8 | papierkorp | 46% | 24 |
| #9 | OLYMPUS | 44% | 80 |
| #10 | CrazyGun | 40% | 109 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | paulseN | 7 | 0.0025 |
| #2 | ❄︎ DarlienTheUnicornS ❄ | 7 | 0.0025 |
| #3 | OLYMPUS | 7 | 0.0042 |
| #4 | CrazyGun | 3 | 0.0013 |
| #5 | JojoS | 3 | 0.0022 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | paulseN | 401 | 0.14 | 8 min |
| #2 | JojoS | 165 | 0.12 | 4 min |
| #3 | OLYMPUS | 150 | 0.09 | 3 min |
| #4 | CrazyGun | 123 | 0.05 | 3 min |
| #5 | ❄︎ DarlienTheUnicornS ❄ | 121 | 0.04 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | JojoS | +3.70 | 93 | 72 |
| #2 | Sickless | +2.91 | 80 | 60 |
| #3 | paulseN | +2.03 | 76 | 67 |
| #4 | SkYLinE | +1.58 | 68 | 72 |
| #5 | schib | +1.39 | 69 | 68 |





