








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1069 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 349 matches | ||
| Wingman | 181 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 79 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 72 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 41 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 29 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 21 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 20 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 2 matches | ||
| Faceit | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 19 different maps





Our logs show 104 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




34 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
5361 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 24,324 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 7516 | 31% |
| Smokes | 7316 | 30% |
| HE Grenades | 4894 | 20% |
| Molotovs | 4598 | 19% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,658,541 of utility $100 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 1422 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | h3mp | 56% | 108 |
| #2 | Sugar mommy | 55% | 192 |
| #3 | Potatoboi. | 54% | 59 |
| #4 | Goose | 51% | 311 |
| #5 | good uncle | 50% | 349 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #4 | Goose | 51% | 311 |
| #5 | good uncle | 50% | 349 |
| #6 | ShanlegDApirate | 49% | 87 |
| #7 | Mapuuuu | 47% | 55 |
| #8 | MoLtnGG | 44% | 50 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Goose | 66 | 0.0105 |
| #2 | good uncle | 60 | 0.0093 |
| #3 | Sugar mommy | 38 | 0.0101 |
| #4 | ShanlegDApirate | 10 | 0.0058 |
| #5 | MoLtnGG | 8 | 0.0076 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | good uncle | 936 | 0.14 | 22 min |
| #2 | Goose | 862 | 0.14 | 18 min |
| #3 | Potatoboi. | 435 | 0.36 | 11 min |
| #4 | Sugar mommy | 213 | 0.06 | 4 min |
| #5 | MoLtnGG | 176 | 0.17 | 5 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Potatoboi. | +4.66 | 45 | 78 |
| #2 | MoLtnGG | +3.94 | 69 | 63 |
| #3 | Mapuuuu | +3.33 | 63 | 64 |
| #4 | h3mp | +1.50 | 36 | 66 |
| #5 | Goose | +0.99 | 41 | 58 |





