








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1355 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 301 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 54 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 35 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 34 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 19 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 18 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 64 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




14 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3958 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 14,173 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3725 | 26% |
| Smokes | 4809 | 34% |
| HE Grenades | 2275 | 16% |
| Molotovs | 3364 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,019,928 of utility $196 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 193 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Potatoboi. | 68% | 79 |
| #2 | Sugar mommy | 65% | 129 |
| #3 | ertadukas | 64% | 39 |
| #4 | ShanlegDApirate | 62% | 68 |
| #5 | Kajo | 56% | 108 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Goose | 44 | 0.0074 |
| #2 | Sugar mommy | 13 | 0.0051 |
| #3 | ShanlegDApirate | 9 | 0.0066 |
| #4 | Kajo | 3 | 0.0013 |
| #5 | Pauly Matrix | 3 | 0.0016 |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Potatoboi. | +4.73 | 44 | 81 |
| #2 | h3mp | +1.58 | 37 | 68 |
| #3 | Sugar mommy | +1.22 | 47 | 40 |
| #4 | Goose | +0.62 | 38 | 60 |
| #5 | ertadukas | -0.83 | 18 | 62 |





