








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 244 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 73 matches | ||
| Faceit | 36 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 32 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 21 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 14 different maps





Our logs show 31 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




10 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3718 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 12,002 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1950 | 16% |
| Smokes | 2989 | 25% |
| HE Grenades | 3247 | 27% |
| Molotovs | 3816 | 32% |
Our logs show you have wasted $823,746 of utility $134 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 277 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #8 | kas ♥ [s] | 59% | 78 |
| #9 | global elite from kazakhstan | 54% | 24 |
| #10 | Nade - ♿ UTTER RETARD | 53% | 19 |
| #11 | zoinks⬆ | 41% | 41 |
| #12 | edeninho | 40% | 15 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | leddy_counterstrike_gamer_07 | 695 | 0.13 | 19 min |
| #2 | kas ♥ [s] | 100 | 0.06 | 3 min |
| #3 | zoinks⬆ | 90 | 0.11 | 1 min |
| #4 | Xetherato ツ | 84 | 0.22 | 2 min |
| #5 | Mac | 76 | 0.15 | 3 min |





