








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 132 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 323 matches | ||
| Faceit | 63 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 8 different maps





Our logs show 3 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




18 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4517 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 7,823 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1281 | 16% |
| Smokes | 3172 | 41% |
| HE Grenades | 1956 | 25% |
| Molotovs | 1414 | 18% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,853,564 of utility $203 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 344 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | R0cco | 57% | 60 |
| #2 | BiSHiKoN | 56% | 125 |
| #3 | Kid1Tap | 56% | 45 |
| #4 | cimota | 54% | 92 |
| #5 | Smegz | 53% | 130 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | BiSHiKoN | 56% | 125 |
| #3 | Kid1Tap | 56% | 45 |
| #4 | cimota | 54% | 92 |
| #5 | Smegz | 53% | 130 |
| #6 | sippin | 50% | 34 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Smegz | 9 | 0.0032 |
| #2 | BiSHiKoN | 3 | 0.0011 |
| #3 | Kid1Tap | 3 | 0.0032 |
| #4 | cimota | 2 | 0.0010 |
| #5 | sippin | 2 | 0.0027 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | cimota | 397 | 0.20 | 9 min |
| #2 | BiSHiKoN | 378 | 0.14 | 11 min |
| #3 | Smegz | 278 | 0.10 | 7 min |
| #4 | R0cco | 133 | 0.11 | 4 min |
| #5 | sippin | 106 | 0.14 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | greap | +1.42 | 79 | 46 |
| #2 | BiSHiKoN | +0.56 | 85 | 72 |
| #3 | Kid1Tap | +0.04 | 79 | 62 |
| #4 | Smegz | -0.01 | 82 | 69 |
| #5 | sippin | -0.10 | 67 | 64 |





