








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 61 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 86 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 7 different maps





Our logs show 6 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




7 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1172 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 3,827 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 333 | 9% |
| Smokes | 1540 | 40% |
| HE Grenades | 1052 | 27% |
| Molotovs | 902 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $288,618 of utility $106 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 13 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Rub | 62% | 76 |
| #2 | Greaper | 55% | 108 |
| #3 | SkriL | 54% | 108 |
| #4 | CakeAndBanana | 53% | 47 |
| #5 | Cond0r- | 50% | 14 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | SkriL | 54% | 108 |
| #4 | CakeAndBanana | 53% | 47 |
| #5 | Cond0r- | 50% | 14 |
| #6 | 2mas | 36% | 14 |
| #7 | Bot Pope | 33% | 12 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Rub | 4 | 0.0025 |
| #2 | SkriL | 3 | 0.0013 |
| #3 | Greaper | 3 | 0.0013 |
| #4 | 2mas | 1 | 0.0031 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Greaper | 322 | 0.14 | 10 min |
| #2 | SkriL | 274 | 0.12 | 6 min |
| #3 | Rub | 206 | 0.13 | 5 min |
| #4 | CakeAndBanana | 126 | 0.13 | 3 min |
| #5 | 2mas | 28 | 0.09 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Cond0r- | +3.95 | 87 | 49 |
| #2 | Rub | +0.92 | 64 | 49 |
| #3 | Greaper | +0.84 | 67 | 78 |
| #4 | SkriL | +0.45 | 44 | 70 |
| #5 | GTIX | +0.26 | 61 | 46 |





