








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 476 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 259 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match | ||
| Faceit | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 8 different maps





Our logs show 42 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




7 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3266 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 13,263 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3505 | 26% |
| Smokes | 3611 | 27% |
| HE Grenades | 3324 | 25% |
| Molotovs | 2823 | 21% |
Our logs show you have wasted $679,163 of utility $105 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 26 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Rub | 55% | 195 |
| #2 | GTIX | 55% | 108 |
| #3 | cj | 54% | 37 |
| #4 | CakeAndBanana | 52% | 66 |
| #5 | SkriL | 51% | 252 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #5 | SkriL | 51% | 252 |
| #6 | Cond0r- | 44% | 25 |
| #7 | Bot Pope | 43% | 37 |
| #8 | 2mas | 42% | 53 |
| #9 | Lau | 38% | 32 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Rub | 8 | 0.0019 |
| #2 | GTIX | 7 | 0.0031 |
| #3 | SkriL | 4 | 0.0007 |
| #4 | cj | 2 | 0.0025 |
| #5 | 2mas | 1 | 0.0008 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | SkriL | 593 | 0.11 | 12 min |
| #2 | Rub | 524 | 0.12 | 11 min |
| #3 | CakeAndBanana | 174 | 0.12 | 4 min |
| #4 | cj | 145 | 0.18 | 4 min |
| #5 | 2mas | 128 | 0.11 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Cond0r- | +3.04 | 83 | 55 |
| #2 | SkriL | +0.76 | 45 | 68 |
| #3 | Greaper | +0.71 | 61 | 77 |
| #4 | Rub | +0.52 | 60 | 50 |
| #5 | GTIX | +0.39 | 59 | 47 |





