








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 67 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 83 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show 4 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




4 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1045 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 4,388 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1377 | 31% |
| Smokes | 1080 | 25% |
| HE Grenades | 1014 | 23% |
| Molotovs | 917 | 21% |
Our logs show you have wasted $163,036 of utility $54 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 21 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | finals mvp mavs in 7 | 49% | 70 |
| #4 | Lader | 47% | 15 |
| #5 | yacob (colorblind) | 45% | 29 |
| #6 | holy n worf | 43% | 77 |
| #7 | JK-47 | 33% | 9 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | holy n worf | 9 | 0.0053 |
| #2 | Destan^* | 8 | 0.0045 |
| #3 | finals mvp mavs in 7 | 6 | 0.0040 |
| #4 | yacob (colorblind) | 3 | 0.0047 |
| #5 | Lader | 1 | 0.0034 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Destan^* | 450 | 0.25 | 12 min |
| #2 | holy n worf | 212 | 0.12 | 5 min |
| #3 | yacob (colorblind) | 84 | 0.13 | 2 min |
| #4 | finals mvp mavs in 7 | 41 | 0.03 | 0 min |
| #5 | Lader | 20 | 0.07 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | finals mvp mavs in 7 | +4.04 | 86 | 12 |
| #2 | Destan^* | +2.25 | 69 | 62 |
| #3 | yacob (colorblind) | +0.79 | 85 | 58 |
| #4 | holy n worf | -0.93 | 63 | 42 |
| #5 | JASE | -1.58 | 62 | 53 |





