








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 179 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 20 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 20 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




8 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
547 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 2,411 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 692 | 29% |
| Smokes | 584 | 24% |
| HE Grenades | 527 | 22% |
| Molotovs | 608 | 25% |
Our logs show you have wasted $211,144 of utility $164 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 72 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | jääkarhupurkka | 100% | 3 |
| #2 | late | 73% | 11 |
| #3 | Teuv0 | 67% | 12 |
| #4 | KooJii | 60% | 5 |
| #5 | Kkammos | 59% | 29 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Art0♚ | 4 | 0.0064 |
| #2 | Kkammos | 2 | 0.0032 |
| #3 | janki | 1 | 0.0074 |
| #4 | jääkarhupurkka | 1 | 0.0175 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Kkammos | 89 | 0.14 | 2 min |
| #2 | dj | 77 | 0.11 | 2 min |
| #3 | Art0♚ | 65 | 0.10 | 2 min |
| #4 | Jjuimi | 53 | 0.18 | 1 min |
| #5 | Teuv0 | 49 | 0.20 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | jääkarhupurkka | +7.60 | 78 | 48 |
| #2 | KooJii | +3.31 | 70 | 72 |
| #3 | eeddspeaks laivalla | +3.27 | 80 | 78 |
| #4 | Teuv0 | +1.81 | 79 | 84 |
| #5 | korso | +1.01 | 83 | 61 |





