








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 426 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 146 matches | ||
| Faceit | 70 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 3 matches | ||
| Wingman | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Italy | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Grail | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 16 different maps





Our logs show 10 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




23 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3260 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 13,051 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3384 | 26% |
| Smokes | 3667 | 28% |
| HE Grenades | 3001 | 23% |
| Molotovs | 2999 | 23% |
Our logs show you have wasted $898,651 of utility $134 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 724 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Vardu | 73% | 22 |
| #2 | Mestari | 67% | 54 |
| #3 | Häccine | 58% | 19 |
| #4 | Guppy)) | 57% | 69 |
| #5 | Lemmikki | 53% | 60 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #10 | _shaws | 47% | 19 |
| #11 | Sush11 | 47% | 76 |
| #12 | Tude | 44% | 32 |
| #13 | lev1z | 44% | 39 |
| #14 | :) | 43% | 37 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Lemmikki | 22 | 0.0182 |
| #2 | Tumpe | 15 | 0.0096 |
| #3 | SemiLei | 8 | 0.0024 |
| #4 | korkki™ | 7 | 0.0025 |
| #5 | Sush11 | 7 | 0.0042 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | korkki™ | 651 | 0.23 | 19 min |
| #2 | SemiLei | 350 | 0.11 | 8 min |
| #3 | Sush11 | 237 | 0.14 | 6 min |
| #4 | Tumpe | 218 | 0.14 | 5 min |
| #5 | Lemmikki | 207 | 0.17 | 5 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Lemmikki | +1.88 | 81 | 59 |
| #2 | Guru | +1.59 | 70 | 67 |
| #3 | Tumpe | +1.45 | 82 | 56 |
| #4 | :) | +0.45 | 82 | 66 |
| #5 | Sush11 | +0.41 | 76 | 63 |





