








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 29 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 28 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




3 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1054 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 2,242 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 477 | 21% |
| Smokes | 631 | 28% |
| HE Grenades | 412 | 18% |
| Molotovs | 722 | 32% |
Our logs show you have wasted $187,456 of utility $119 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 10 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Alisus | 2 | 0.0031 |
| #2 | Kare | 2 | 0.0048 |
| #3 | elmagico. | 1 | 0.0019 |
| #4 | pelle | 1 | 0.0030 |
| #5 | suqbe | 1 | 0.0036 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | elmagico. | 160 | 0.30 | 5 min |
| #2 | Alisus | 120 | 0.19 | 3 min |
| #3 | pelle | 64 | 0.19 | 2 min |
| #4 | suqbe | 39 | 0.14 | 1 min |
| #5 | Kare | 32 | 0.08 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | elmagico. | +4.85 | 92 | 71 |
| #2 | Vernz | +4.10 | 92 | 55 |
| #3 | Alisus | +3.87 | 90 | 60 |
| #4 | Boris Lime | +0.22 | 59 | 47 |
| #5 | suqbe | -0.40 | 50 | 74 |





